Wednesday, March 6, 2013

Social Drinking Excellence: Jamie Jeanette Craft

An Arkansas woman running around with no pants on? Somewhere out there, President Clinton's grinning like the Cheshire Cat.

Start the clock...
  1. To be fair, if you were stuck in Arkansas, wouldn't you drink at least three times the legal limit, just to cope with being stuck in Arkansas?
  2. ...In fact, shouldn't the "legal limit" be a minimum, and not a maximum, in Arkansas?
  3. Wait, she crashed her car into a mobile home? First of all, the term "mobile home" has always seemed a little inaccurate to me, since I don't think I've ever seen one on the road. I know they have wheels, and it's not the tornadoes that are delivering them to the trailer parks. But every time I see one, it's completely immobile. And second: If these things are mobile, how are they always in harm's way? Tornadoes, hurricanes, drunk drivers, and childhood obesity just seem to have a radar lock on mobile homes.
  4. SHE GOT AWAY?! Who was the officer in pursuit? Clancy Wiggum?
  5. You know, last year some of us bought TJ's son a Power Wheels for his birthday. Looks like I have an exit strategy.
Jamie, your Rummy Award's in the mail. I included some extra batteries in the box, for the next time you're on the run from Sheriff Buford T. Justice.

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